Here’s where you’ll find bio information on me; some of it may be relatively free of exaggeration.

profile 2018

Agreed-Upon Facts:

  • Manufactured in Germany in 1966. Exported to the USA in 1968. Occupied Illinois, Indiana, Texas, and Arizona. Exiled to Maryland in 1979.
  • Infiltrated and subverted Eleanor Roosevelt Senior High School, University of Maryland College Park, and Washington College. Absconded with documentation alleging educational attainment.
  • In 1988, sentenced to lifetime imprisonment with Most-Favored Concubine, code-named “Joni.”
  • Released Daughter 1.0 (code-named “Elizabeth”) in 1993.
  • Forcibly relocated to Scenic, Convenient-to-Nowhere, MD in 1998.
  • Began ongoing servitude with U.S. Federal government agencies of disappointingly non-sinister bent.
  • Released Daughter 2.0 (code-named “Ally-Jane”) in 1999.
  • Unleashed website in 2006, to worldwide indifference.
  • In 2012, unleashed two-part young adult fantasy novel Dragontamer’s Daughters, to worldwide indifference.
  • Committed literary crime known as Lost Dogs, in September 2014.
  • Conspired with known supervillain Patrick Eibel to publish Our Wild Place, a children’s propaganda picture book, in April 2015.
  • In July 2015, edited and re-released Dragontamer’s Daughters in one volume
  • Unleashed latest atrocity, This Wasted Land, in November 2018

Unverified Information:

The (self-perpetuated) rumor that Robert Plant is my biological father is, alas, untrue. Or so my mother asserts.


Leave a Reply