why do i love you?

why do i love you? (for joni)

…for your smile, and the way you wear your hair. And because you look great all dressed up or just bumming around in sweats.

…because you make the best pancakes. And meatloaf. And spaghetti. And grilled cheese sandwiches. Though I could live without the tomato soup.

…because you laugh at my jokes, even the ones that are kinda mean. Because you don’t really mind if I fart. Or stink up the bathroom.

…because you always understand I’m talking about, whether it’s football, or money, or computers, or politics, or whatever.

…because nothing is more important to you than our family.

…because you are patient with me. Because you forgive me for doing dumb or bad things.

…because you like animals. Even that spastic monkey-dog of mine. And because all cats love you. Horses, too.

…because the sight of blood or puke doesn’t bother you, but you want me to get rid of spiders and dead critters the cats bring us.

…because you don’t like to drive and always let me drive. And because you usually don’t mind when I roll down the window.

…because you like museums and amusement parks and watching football and riding bikes and swimming and going for walks and playing tennis and seeing movies. Because you like to read and put together photo albums and take naps on long days and watch videos on Friday nights. Because you like to play board games and you almost always win.

…because you like to play make-believe with our girls.

…because you like to mow the lawn and walk the dogs and plant flowers in the garden and shovel snow and clean up the dog poop in the backyard and help me fix things around the house.

…because you like doing fun things outside and you make me come outside and do fun things, too, even when I think I don’t want to.

…because you like going shopping—but not so much that it’s boring. And because you do the grocery shopping by yourself because I think it’s boring.

…because you don’t like fancy food. And because you don’t make a big deal out of your weight or what you eat.

…because you like to sing, and you sing well. Because you don’t mind my singing.

…because the things that annoy me, annoy you, too.

…because you think I’m handsome. And smart. And that I have a cool job.

…because to you, having new cars and a big house and the latest toys isn’t as important as being able to stay home with our children.

…because you like to go to church. And you feel bad if you don’t go.

…because you still miss your dad.

…because you love your mom and your brother and your sisters, even if they are all messed up. And because you don’t mind when I tell you that they’re all messed up.

…because you like the stories I write.

…because you play the “Punchbuggy” game with me and the kids.

…because you like the music I like, most of it, anyway. And because when a song you like comes on the radio, you turn it up real loud and sing along and dance just like you did when you were a teenager.

…because you don’t like golf.

…because you always think I’m interesting.

…because you like going anywhere on vacation just so long as they have bathrooms.

…because Diet Pepsi is your favorite drink.

…because every guy I know wishes he was married to you, because you’re pretty, and sweet, and fun, and kind. Because you’re not prissy. Because you’re not whiny. Because you don’t nag. Because you don’t call me names. Because you don’t throw away money.

…because you didn’t think it was silly to get married so young.

…because you like to pretend with me what we’ll be like when we’re old. You’ll be sweet and scatterbrained and I’ll be grumpy and incoherent and our kids will be totally exasperated with us. And you’ll have a mean little purse dog and I’ll yell at kids to get off our lawn and you’ll tell them to pay me no mind.

…because you loved me before I knew I loved you. And when I thought I didn’t love you. And you love me even more now that I know better.

Posted January 2008